Helsinki diary

butterfly edition. January-current situation ₊˚⊹ 𐦍༘

First week I arrived to Helsinki I went to see Tove Jansson exhibition at HAM. Focused on her large scale public works. All of her public works had beautiful signatures, with a painted detail reminding of a logo, each different from the other.

I walk a lot here, and think a lot, when I am not listening to podcasts and just soaking in the environment. I found myself falling into this inner dialog, where a writer alter ego has emerged. Narrating a written novel as I walk, about this walk. Something like that, do you know what I mean? Anyway, I digress.

One of the times I kept thinking about these details on Tove Jansson’s paintings and wondered if I was to make an icon of sorts for my time here, what would it be?

It turned out it will be a butterfly. Why? Because apparently on the 6th of January 2025, I, human adult woman, old enough to feel embarrassed to admit this comparison, that I felt like a one. I will spare you the details of that blanked note between all the butterflies.

But not like a butterfly out of cocoon, not at all, not like shining bright like a diamond and spreading wings. That’s for sure. More of like, flapping, wandering streets of snowy Helsinki.

Maybe I shouldn’t do the butterfly and maybe it should be something else. And then I made a small sculpture. Painted with watercolours. It broke the next day and I have forgotten about it.

Few weeks later one day in February, I needed to make a little collection of patterns. Winter had pines, autumn had birches and summer had butterflies. I’m very pleased with this pattern. One butterfly is wearing glasses and shoes. As always, I quickly forget about it, because the next thing came along.

Wouldn’t it be a great pattern for some clothing? Or a summer table cloth? Or a cute coffee packaging? Individual butterflies look so stylish too.

Then was a relief test print, pressed for time I had to go back to familiar motif. I carved a butterfly with glasses and snazzy boots. The result was fuzzy, silly and not yet scanned so I can’t show you.

Kathleen Kelly in film You’ve Got Mail wrote: “Once I read a story about a butterfly in the subway, and today, I saw one! It got on at 42nd and off at 59th, where, I assume, it was going to Bloomingdales to buy a hat that will turn out to be a mistake, as almost all hats are.”

This is the butterfly I am drawing, I think. Butterfly hasn’t bought the hat yet.

Blue butterflies drawn sometime in April while listening to someone talk, the pen kept leaking into the paper, leaving these fun dots. This is the butterfly I thought, this is the butterfly for my yearly logo, with cute wings and blotted antennas. And then the lecture finished, I closed my sketchbook and forgot about it.

I also drew this other butterfly for school work, which unfortunately I can’t share until June but it was the cutest butterfly with these holes and polka dots and it was SO SILLY and so FUN. It is a pattern and it’s adooooorable, I hope it will be bought and made into a product because it’s just too cute.

I forgot about the logo, but I remember about this hole punch idea. Then I go see a friend we hit second hand shops and we buy matching hole punches. They had two.

Then the weekend arrives, I am high on coffee, I spend some time making collages.

It’s spring, it’s flowers, it’s butterflies. And worms in butter yellow. It’s holes.

I have forgotten about that logo idea, also about these delicate butterfly drawn in a line. I can not out butterfly this situation. We have arrived. I have drawn everything I have to draw about butterflies.

P.S. Unless I need to do something quickly and suddenly the only thing which appears is a butterfly.

Also how peculiar is the english word for butterfly?

Talk to you soon,

Viktorija